Have you ever had a moment where someone told you something was wrong between you and another person, or you probably come to the realization yourself?
You may remember that you are incredibly dissatisfied with how they once behaved around you or how they treat you. With these, you may realize that your partner has no respect for you as a person. You come to realize they have been taking advantage of you the whole time.
Either way, you’re wondering why you didn’t see it right away. The red flags are usually obvious. However, as thinking creatures, we want to believe that our partner would always have our backs and our needs at heart, leading to ignoring these signs.
Just like you, there are a couple of red flags flapping high in the wind that I have ignored and have come back biting me. You should know that not all signs are visible, but here are a few ones that are always prominent.
1. Lack of trust
Why would you date someone you do not trust? It is no news that there is no love without trust. Regardless of what side it comes from, lack of trust in a relationship is 100 percent unacceptable. If you don’t trust your partner, you may feel agitated, worried, and angry. In fact, you tend to suspect them, question their acts, and monitor them. On the other hand, if they don’t trust you, you might feel like they’re watching you all the time, which leaves you feeling constrained and suffocated.
2. They guilt trip you at every given chance
It can be hard to recognize guilt-tripping or manipulating behavior because it’s normally performed using gaslighting, which makes you question every fact even when the truth is staring at you. Most times, they make you feel like you don’t value them, making you feel obligated to go the extra mile to show affection.
They make you look selfish for asking for too much hence, causing you to devalue yourself. Without a doubt, this is a deal-breaker, and regardless of how you feel, you might not be able to save this relationship even if you try. LEAVE!!!
3. They justify their terrible behaviors
If there is one red flag that should never be accepted, tolerated, or excused, it is the inability to accept wrongs and apologize. IF you are with a partner who never apologizes even after hurting you but always backup this act with reasons why they do so, leave. There is no excuse to justify this act, just take your leave and never look back because acts like these lead to physical abuse.
4. You cannot tell your partner how you feel
It quite understandable that it takes some people a while to completely open up to a new relationship. However, if you find it really difficult to communicate or share your emotions with them, then something is wrong. “For example, you feel scared to voice your opinions, concerns, or ideas because you feel your partner might laugh at you or criticize you. Nothing ruins a relationship other than this.
Come to think of it, if you find it extremely difficult to be yourself in courting days, trust me, you would become someone that you don’t recognize years down the line.
5. Controlling behavior
If your partner chooses your friends, family members you should relate with for you, tells you where to go, etc. There is a huge problem somewhere. Partners with this behavior would always see you as their subordinate.
There are a several red flags that tend to come up in relationships. Those mentioned above are just a few. Hence if you notice any of these warning signals that your relationship isn’t as happy as you think it should be, consider talking to your partner about what you’re feeling. This might be beneficial if you want to fix problems, and talking also might make your relationship stronger.
However, if the red flags you see lead to an abusive or toxic relationship, or you feel unsafe and insecure, then the healthiest and safest thing to do is end the relationship. There is no two way to it. LEAVE!!!